Everything Can Change
I finished lunch a little while ago, and now I have a "sticking" pain in the right side. I think I may still have pleurisy and pneumonia, too. It feels really heavy under my ribs—like my abdomen is full of fluid. I feel like a watermelon.
I was reading another blog—Bad Pancreas—and she was talking about being whole. I understand what she means, despite my not really feeling whole for the past four years. My life, too, was shattered and I picked up what was left. And now I am who I am because of my past—because of everything I knew being ripped apart. It has taken a long time for me to get to where I am now. I now feel like am whole just the way I am. I don't need anyone else to make me feel complete. And that's OK. I like it like this. If I were a lot younger I might feel differently. But I guess I'll never know that.
I know she was talking about how being sick can change your life. And I'm talking about losing a life partner. There are many, many events in life that can change everything. One day life is what is it is, and the next, it's all different. And no one asked you if that was OK with you. It just happens. Then it's time to make new plans.
OK. I'm getting weird. Too philosophical maybe. Funny. I'm actually listening to DEVO sing "Whip It" right now. How weird is that?
Get straight, go forward, move ahead. . . .
The next song on my MPV? Don Henley's "In a New York Minute."
In New York minute, everything can change
In New York minute, things can get a little strange. . . .
