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Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label forgiveness. Show all posts

Embracing Forgiveness, Empowering the Future

Posted by Aldie at 8:13 AM | 0 comments

Yea. I worked out this morning. Well, I walked a little more than two miles. That means I exercised in some sort of way five times this week—one day I worked out twice. Today, I feel more like my old self than I have in more than a year. I'm excited. Next week I'm planning to go to at least one Zumba class with a friend. Maybe I'll do more. I intend to go the gym as well, and maybe I'll even make the Pilates class.

This morning, I noticed there were a couple of older women in it. And I didn't notice until there were only 15 minutes of class time left. I was surprised and bummed out. I assumed it would always be a class filled with young people, and I was wrong. So you know what they say about assuming? (Note: I am happy about this because I am 51 years old. Sorry if it came off like I was being a jerk. No way. I love it.)

Forgiving and Moving Forward
Today I'm working on positive thinking and forgiveness. There are some people in my life that I will have a tough time forgiving. But forgiving doesn't mean forgetting, and it's my choice as to whether I have them in my life or just choose to forgive and move on.

Also, I think that the self-absorbed pity party is over. Thank God. I was getting kind of tired of me.

Nutrition Not So Great
Nutrition has been so, so. I eat healthy food—but I'm still indulging here and there—mostly here, and there, And maybe over there. Anyway, more than I should be. Usually once I get beyond a depressive episode, the chocolate cravings stop. I'm still waiting.

I'm looking forward to some warmer weather this weekend. When it's been well below freezing, anything above 32 degrees feels like a heat wave.

Don't know if I'll be writing this weekend. If not, I'll see you Monday.

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Losing the Crutches and Living

Posted by Aldie at 9:13 AM | 0 comments

When I said that I was thinking about talking more about my childhood, I didn't mean that I intended to constantly rehash the past. I'm finished with feeling sorry for myself. I do, however, want to understand "how I got this way." For me, what it comes down to is forgiveness. And forgiveness goes a long way in healing. It's when people hold onto their stories as a way of justifying their overeating, drinking, drug taking that they never get better—and get depressed.


All of the crutches that we refuse to let go and then believe that no one understands us comes down to this: Millions of people understand what we've been through. Millions of people know exactly what we're talking about. Hiding it helps no one. Relying on it so we can justify remaining bitter, angry, and depressed keeps the cycle going.

I'm tired of hiding my past. I have a friend who openly admits that he was an alcoholic and drug addict in his youth. He doesn't even try to hide it. And what he gets out of that is never having to worry that someone might find out. He doesn't hide behind who he was 20 years ago. I admire his courage. That's what I want to do. Let it go. Purge it. Forgive those who brought me pain. And then live.




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