Life is Healthy

I wanted to have something to say today, but I've don't have any revelations to share. In fact, I feel kind of blank. I would like to offer you a link to an article I wrote: Real Ways to Deal with Stress. I has some good ideas about coping with stress.

Continuing to Resolve
I'm working on keeping my resolutions. Tomorrow morning I'm going to start going to a pilates class. I used to do pilates all the time when I was much younger. As I recall, I liked it. On Wednesday, we're having a Zumba demonstration at work. They've asked that we dress comfortably so I guess we get to participate. I'm never really clear on what people mean by demonstrate. Do they mean we're just supposed to watch? Or do they mean we're going to show you how by having you do it?

Still Reflecting
Last week's weather really put me in a funk. I watched another episode of This Emotional Life today--I recorded it. It wasn't actually on. Anyway, one of the points they made was that your happiness depends on you. It comes down to how you deal with life's ups and downs. It depends on your ability to forgive. Your resilience. That's a simple summation of the show, but that was the basic premise. They did say, however, that our social relationships were, in the end, the key to happiness.

I thought about how many times I've laughed out loud when in the company of friends and family. And then how many times I've laughed out loud when I'm alone. I don't think I have to tell you how that comparison worked out. I'm still reflecting on that as well.

Considering Volumetrics

I watched a lot of TV yesterday, and in the process learned more about myself than I have in years.  Through PBS's This Emotional Life, I discovered that my ruminative thinking is not only learned, it's also likely genetic. My mother and father used this kind of thinking—in other words, they dwelled on everything—why didn't you call? Where have you been? Who were you with? And that wasn't just with me. It was with each other.

Memories of Hard Times
In my house, anger, guilt, and depression dominated, and they were accompanied with addictive behaviors—eating and drinking always to excess. There was also a lot of fighting. My parents didn't pay attention to us kids unless it was to scream at us. I took the flack for everyone mostly because I was tired of living like we did. My parents had many hard times, and they tended to take it out on us—but especially me. I was the middle child.  I tried to make peace in the family many times but usually failed. That typically led to me being punished. And this activity was circular.

Why am I talking about this now? Because psychologists now realize that to truly cope with past memories, you have to remember them. You have to face them to understand them and make peace with them.

Biggest Loser Preserves Spirit, Wins Hearts, Faces Challenge 
As I watched Eric Chopin discuss his trials, failures, and disappointments last night, I identified with him more than I've identified with anyone for a very long time. When he said: "I'm just trying to figure who I'm supposed to be on this earth," I thought he was really telling my story. Sometimes I think I've never really known who I am. Ask my friends and family. I often say that I have no idea why I'm still here.

He also talked about having a feeling inside that he would fail. He said he failed. I understand that, too. Sometimes I think I'm so afraid of failing that I don't even want to try.

And he discussed an almost all or nothing attitude. I have that, too. If I'm focused on losing weight, that's my focus. Finding a balance is the healthy way.

The pain in Eric's eyes was undeniable. And I didn't just sympathize with him; I empathized with him. I know what it feels like to have to go through it all over again. But he's mustering up his courage to face the battle, and maybe this time win the war. I pray for him. I feel for him.

Facing My Battle
Well, here I am once again. Am I ready? I'm making myself ready.