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Hello darkness my old friend

The weather today looks as miserable as I feel and have being for quite sometime.
I came back to the UK to sort of out a life for me and my family, only to have that taken away again, regardless of the effort I had put in. It seems no matter how hard you try for some people it will never be enough. I'm angry with some of the choices that I made but they were at least my choices, but now I need to learn to make the right choices in order to move forward. Since the split I have had some very dark days and a few wobbles, some more serious than others and after several looooong chats with some friends I know Telford at least, isn't going to give me what I want and need. I also need to seek professional help as it's thought I have a bi-polar spectrum disorder.

I have decided that I'm off women too. No, I haven't changed sides, regardless of what some people may think already. I just need much more time to sort myself out - with that in mind I am going to move away for a year. I will still pursue my photography as I really enjoy it and believe there can be a future in it. But I haven't learnt as much as I expected here, so more effort and more like minded people to grow and learn from required.

I feel that I have let some people down but sadly the state I'm in is not good and I cannot offer them what they want or need right now, giving myself time and space will hopefully fix that. Newdawn still exists and for now I will be behind the scenes more and Huss will take the reigns. So if I go quiet for a while, like I have been, don't worry I'm just trying to get my life back in order again, no matter what they say it doesn't get any easier.

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