It's Not the Worst, and It's Getting Better
The week has been interesting to say the least. I went to the arthritis doctor. I found out my arthritis is no where near as bad as I thought it was. And I left the doctor's office amazed at how I made the situation worse than what it really was. I imagined that my knees were bone-on-bone and should've been replaced a long time ago. But the doctor said on a scale of one to 10, with 10 being the worst, my knees are a three. (And he has x-rays to prove it.)
I'm glad he did the x-rays. I needed to see that my knees aren't ready to collapse under me. Now, exercise is an option. The doctor gave me an arthritis medication, and it's helping. He said I would probably have to take it for a couple of weeks to see the real benefit. But it already feels better.
So where am I in terms of weight loss? I'm getting back to where I once was. But I do need to add the exercise back into the equation so I can really get back to where I was.
Spiritually I've had a moment or two where I really understood the universe and how it works. I understand why I always end up in the same situations over and over. Now I'm trying to figure out how to change that once and for all. Meditation helps. Talking helps. And thinking about things in very different terms helps, too.
But it's going to take time. I finally, once and for all, want to get beyond believing that I'm a failure. I want to believe in my own personal power. Life is journey. I want to enjoy mine.
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